i cured my anxiety!

* This is dedicated to anyone who has struggled with anxiety or an incomprehensible fear*

I was siting in the bathtub filled with hot water and i was freezing cold. My heart was pounding so hard i could feel the veins in my neck pulsing up into my ears. i started to feel chest pains going from left to right, sharp pain one minute and a crushing pain the next. my fingers and toes tingled as i rocked back and forth in the tub singing and humming random songs to distract myself. The sound of my heartbeat was slamming in my ears. I added more hot water and left the tap on and laid back into the noise to drown out the silence of the bathroom. I continued humming and counting the ceiling tiles over and over again as my panic attack continued into the eighth hour...I was exhausted, scared and I felt more than crazy. It was at this point that I realized I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if I had begun to hear voices. I was still shaking and felt cold in the hot water. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I wanted to die. I was sick of struggling and I was running out of hope.

Doctors I had seen told me I was fine, the E.C.G (electrocardiogram) and heart monitor I was given to bring home provided no information to state I had heart troubles of any kind. They told me i was stressed and perhaps depressed. But i didn't feel stressed and the reason I was getting depressed was because I was having one panic attack after another. I have always been full of energy and the life of the party. But now I was so sick of feeling this way and missing school, I couldn't function at work and I couldn't drive or leave the house for fear of embarrassing myself with another episode in public.

I laid in the tub and cried, I cried until I woke up when the hot water had turned cold. I was going into the 11th hour of this panic attack and year two of this physical and mental torture. I somehow managed to get enough energy to crawl out of the tub and dry off. I woke up the next morning in my bed quite drained and dazed, foggy, my eyes swollen and dark. Last nights' "episode" was nothing short of a nightmare.

Imagine all the adrenaline and fear of your worst experiences coursing through your entire being threatening to take over. Your rationale, sense of clarity, reason and stability are all suddenly crushed by this unexpected and misplaced terror that seems to have no end. For those of us who have suffered panic attacks and have any sort of anxiety disorder know that the reality of the situation and the mental, physical and emotional sensations are all very real and debilitating. You have become a slave to worry and fear.

that morning I did not go to work, or eat a single thing. In fact i stayed inside on one of the nicest days in quite a while. It was the second week of calling in sick at work and my boss had become quite agitated with my excuses. I finally had to quite my job because just the THOUGHT of going in and having another panic attack at work was enough to cause another episode. I was at the point that I couldn't handle the slightest amount of disruption or change in my life. Even positive changes felt like they were too much to bear. I had to remain level to stay sane, or at least that's what I had convinced myself of. I stopped going to malls at one point because i had an attack while shopping one day. I was buying a shirt and started to feel light headed. i grabbed the counter in front of me to steady myself and stood there waiting for the next panic attack symptoms. Sure enough they came one by one in no particular order.

The heart pounding started next, than the dizziness, tingling in my finger tips and that eerie feeling as if all the blood in my body rushed into my stomach and then straight to the top of my head. I started sweating and looking for the nearest exit. The girl gave me my change and I ran out of that mall and couldn't return for about a year. I was turning into an 'agoraphobic'. If I needed anything I would shop at smaller stores so I could get out quick. I even ended up convincing myself that I didn't need things so that I wouldn't have to go shopping for them. I was avoiding places and things I used to enjoy, and it wasn't healthy. I was letting my panic take over my life.

Weeks turned into months, progressively getting worse. I had another panic attack at my husbands work party right in the middle of speeches and another at the doctors office during a blood pressure exam. A normal blood pressure reading is somewhere around 120/80, mine was 147/120. Which was way too high. I could no longer go to the doctor because my panic attacks had now turned into a phobia. I had what is called "white coat syndrome".

I had been having 2 to 5 panic attacks per week for three years straight. My doctor prescribed Ativan which helped take the panic SYMPTOMS away, but not the actual panic attacks. it was a band aid solution to a much deeper problem. I was taking Ativan every time I would feel the slightest symptom and could not leave the house without them. I was becoming dependent on them to function normally. I decided to get more opinions, I went to walk-in clinics and tried several different doctors, even ended up in the Emergency ward a few times with symptoms so severe, I was convinced I was having a heart attack. All of the doctors kept prescribing me the same things...Ativan, Prozac, Zoloft. all of which, i felt, were a short term solution and would do me more harm than good in the long run. I was not going to fill my body with chemicals just to mask the real underlying issue.

I wanted to get to the root of why I was having these panic attacks. Was it something to do with my upbringing? my life's choices as a teenager? my genetics? I was on a mission to help myself. By this time I was sick, literally ill. My weight was fluctuating like crazy, my face no longer had a glow, I had bitten my nails down to nothing, I was always tired and the circles under my eyes were so dark no amount of sleep would correct them.

I felt like i was dying.

Somehow I would still make time to go out with friends to have some sort of 'norm' in my life no matter how small. I would go to small get togethers or the pub and noticed that I felt much better after a few drinks, I felt more at ease, less anxious. This turned into a weekend event, which soon turned into a weekday event as well. I knew this pattern had to stop and fast. Alcohol is known to aggravate the issue even more so.

It was than I decided to see a Naturopath. I made an appointment that week and went in. She went through quite a lengthy questionnaire and a urine test, as well as an allergy test. The results were almost as I had suspected. I had adrenal fatigue, and my liver was not doing as well as it should have been for my age. I was put on a supplement for my adrenal glands and was given a liquid to help me sleep better at night. This was the best step I had taken so far and one step closer to feeling like myself again.

I eventually moved from Ontario to British Columbia. The clean air and scenery was a shock to the system and a wake up call for me. I wanted to explore more of what B.C had to offer. The landscape was so beautiful that I couldn't even describe it when writing home to family, I had no words for it. This is when it hit harder than i could have imagined...I was turning thirty and a slave to my panic attacks. I was now slowly turning into a 'sociaI phobic'. I made myself used to the fact that I would never be able to go shopping in a big mall, or get regular check-ups at the doctors office, go on long road trips for fear of being too far from a hospital, go hiking and not being able to get a signal on my cell phone. All of these things were holding me back from enjoying one of the most beautiful places on earth. I was NOT LIVING MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST.

2009, year six of having panic disorder, I remember this day very clearly because my dog which we adopted from Big Heart Rescue finally learned how to 'sit' and 'give paw' which was a huge deal for me. I leashed my dog up and went online looking for a new park to take him to for his walk, when a link popped up on one of the sites i was browsing, it was for an online bookstore. I decided to browse the site.

What I had found that day and ordered online changed my entire life with one click. I had ordered a book called 'The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook' two weeks later I finished reading it and did all of the exercises and techniques they offered me to do. I actually read it twice because I couldn't believe how much it made sense to me, someone knew exactly what it was like for me, all of my symptoms were explained in detail and my fears were literally taken away with the comforting and reassuring words in the book. My past experiences and how they played a role in my anxiety were made so clear to me. My upbringing and what my parents did or did not do also made an impact in what I was going through. I wish I had found this book years earlier. I had read a lot of anxiety books which were all good, but this one was simple to understand and explore, it was the only one that completely helped me CURE my anxiety and take away my panic attacks completely!

My entire world had begun to change in a short amount of time after reading this book. If someone had told me back than they had a book for me that wouldcure my anxiety, I would have laughed. But it did and I am beyond grateful. My panic attacks had stopped.

I was shopping again.. in BIG malls, going to movies, going hiking, eating out in restaurants full of people, going to see live bands, going to parties and living my life just like i used to before I had anxiety. My skin was beginning to get it's color back, my hair was shiny, I was eating healthier, i was loving every minute of living. I felt like I was nineteen again, and still do.

I could cry thinking about all the time I wasted being a prisoner in my own body, because that is what panic feels like. But today i waste no time getting out and enjoying my life. I wanted to share this information with you because I know millions of people suffer from some form of anxiety and I want you to know that there is help out there and I understand what you are going through. I went through it.

* * My name is Liz Towers, I am now 34 and anxiety FREE !! thanks for reading my experience please feel free to ask me any questions or share your story with me.

Do yourself a favor and get this book 'The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook'.

If you want to do something for yourself today to feel better tomorrow click the link above... you have nothing to loose that you haven't already lost coping with your anxiety on your own.

Stop the cycle:

PANIC ATTACKS EXPLAINED:

" What makes a panic attack unique and difficult to cope with is that these intense bodily reactions occur in the absence of any immediate or apparent danger. Or in the case of agoraphobia, they occur in response to situations that have no apparent life-threatening potential (such as standing in line at a grocery store or being home alone). In either case, you don't know why the reaction is happening. Not knowing why, not being able to make any sense out of the fact that your body is going through such an intense response, only serves to make the entire experience more frightening. Your tendency is to react to sensations that are intense and inexplicable with even more fear and a heightened sense of danger"

'THE ANXIETY AND PHOBIA WORKBOOK'...

SYMPTOMS (four or more at the same time defines a panic attack)

• shortness of breathe
• heart palpitations (rapid, irregular)
• chest pains, dull or sharp
  
• trembling, shaking
• sweating suddenly
• choking feeling
• abdominal distress
• nausea
• dizziness
• unsteadiness
• faint feeling
• feeling detached (dream-like state, but awake)
• hot flashes
• chills
• sudden fears come on (dying, going crazy, loosing control)
• tingling fingers and toes

ENJOY YOUR READING AND ENJOY YOUR LIFE PANIC AND ANXIETY FREE !!!

click to order online, have the book shipped right to your door !

A FEW ONLINE TESTIMONIALS TAKEN FROM AMAZON:

• "If you or someone you know suffers from a panic disorder, anxiety, OCD, or phobias (especially agoraphobia and social phobias), you must read this book. It is THE best source of information and practical help I have ever seen on the subject. The book contains a wide array of topics: causes of anxiety, coping with attacks, pharmaceutical treatments, holistic treatments, psychological approaches, nutrition, relaxation, where to find support, how to give support... the book would be worth triple its price just for the richness of information Dr. Bourne has compiled. Add to that the excellent workbook exercises and techniques, and you have a truly indispensable resource. I was very pleased with the presentation of the material. This book is not overflowing with warm and fuzzy, touchy-feely reassurances like many "self-help" books. Instead, it has proven, practical, self-paced techniques and exercises which you can use in your daily life, presented in a clear and easy-to-digest format. It's not a dry textbook, and it's not a bit of pop-psychology fluff -- this is a powerful tool for anyone whose quality of life has diminished because of anxiety and fear"

• "When I bought this book (for my best friend, who was having panic attacks) I was suffering from severe depression and anxiety. I had been professionally diagnosed, was in therapy, and was on medication; this had helped markedly, but I was still moderately to severely depressed and/or anxious every day. This book helped me get better in a surprisingly short period of time because it is specific, explanatory, and practical. Rather than relying only on one technique (like _Feel Good_'s cognitive therapy approach), it has chapters on nutrition, exercise, visualization, cognitive therapy, mistaken beliefs, emotional needs, spiritual angst, and medication"

• "This book was recommended by my doctor after the death of my wife. It is the best do it yourself manual for overcoming anxiety. I have recommended it to family and friends. In depth information as well as practical steps on how to overcome fears and phobias. Everyone has some general anxiety and everyone can benefit from the step by step how to information in this classic book."

• "I purchased this book mainly because I wanted to get rid of social anxiety. However, as I was reading the book I realized that I had so many other things that I needed to change in my life (all of them probably contribute to social anxiety as well) such as alleviate perfectionism, remove self-doubt and all bad beliefs, become more relaxed in general and create a balance between play and work. The book has helped me to put together a program for myself to reduce anxiety. A few of the steps in the program are relaxation (meditating and visualization), exposure (step by step), becoming more assertive, increasing my self-esteem, changing bad beliefs with good ones, taking care of my needs, etc. I must say that I haven't started with the program yet but I'm going to in a few days and my expectations are very upscale".

• "My counselor that i'm seeing due to my anxiety recommended this book. I really think its great. This book gives you a lot of tools and detailed explanations on different types of anxieties & phobias. If you can't afford to see a dr. or a counselor get this book, it's just as good!"

• "I read this book several times! I was amazed at how the breathing techniques and muscle relaxation exercises, done several times a day...greatly improved my anxiety issues. Who knew that most of us do not know how to breathe correctly, from the abdomen, and accelerate our anxiety from breathing incorrectly? The explanations as to why we suffer for anxiety and panic attacks, helped to reinforce that there are real reasons why we arrive at this state.Understanding the reasons and help with it vastly improved my daily situation.A must read for those that spend each day worrying about when the next attack may happen........??? it won't !!"

• "So far I've only used a small percentage of the tools found in this book and have already had great success. I've been having occurrences of anxiety attacks that prompted me to see a therapist. He recommended this book and I started using the tools found in the early chapters which have really helped me manage my symptoms of anxiety. I haven't eliminated the anxious feelings but I've been able to stay in control, which means I now worry less about the worry. I've perused the rest of the book and see a lot of other tools that will be really helpful"

• "In a world where doctors give you a pill for this and a pill for that it is refreshing to find something that allows one to discover just exactly what those pills were for and what the symptoms were of. This book allows you to own your problems instead of giving them over to a doctor's care. The symptoms that doctors discover and treat are the ones that you have to live with day and night. This book allows you to live with them in a better way...where you are the boss"

• "This book was immediately and hugely helpful for my significant other and enlightening for me as a partner, and we've recommended it to others who, we're told, have had the same reaction. We're not only reading it, but re-reading it and taking notes and following its advice. It has paved the way for us to make big changes in our lives and relationships. Thank you Edmund Bourne, you are helping people"
• "As a long-time sufferer of Panic Disorder, later complicated by Agoraphobia, I have read many, many books on the subject, and this is by far the best. It is comprehensive and familiar. There are exercises and information that will indeed help you to conquer what can be a debilitating and is always a quality-of-life-diminishing disorder. It includes the gamut---from OCD through Agoraphobia. I was frankly surprised (and pleased) that it includes a lengthy section on the spiritual aspect of fighting anxiety. I highly recommend it"
• "This is a great book and only one of many tools to help us on our journey to help ourselves toward a better quality of life living with panic attacks. There are no sure cure for excessive anxiety and panic attacks. But with a good psychologists help for behavior changes, medications to take the edge off, my faith to give me the courage to try and keep trying even when I fail, education through the availability of information published, and a lot of hard work and self evaluation of my own behaviors and coping skills that I have learned throughout my life; I have lessened the harshness and frequency of the attacks.
  Once I learned some of the reasons how I acquired the poor coping skills on how I reacted and saw things to situations in my life I began to start to baby step my way, pray and put the hard work into changing those destructive life coping skills"

• "I only wish I had found this book before I went on Lexapro. I feel this book covers probably almost everyone's "problems. It has wonderful idea's for dealing with a myriad of situation and above all makes you realize that YOU ARE NOT CRAZY! I feel empowered that I can make a difference in how I react to my own mind and what a difference that can make"